Should Win/Will Win: Best Director Edition

[UPDATED March 5, 2009]

NOTE: I may update this post after seeing Avatar this afternoon. I doubt it, but maybe.

And the historic ex-husband/wife deathmatch nominees are:

• Kathryn Bigelow for Watch My Movie, Then Read What My Budget Was. I Think We're Done Here.
• James Cameron for I'm a Sanctimonious Hack Who's Really Good With Technology But Couldn't Come Up With an Identifiable Story With Sympathetic Characters Written Above an 8th-Grade Level if a Gun Were at My Head
• Lee Daniels for Not Very Good With Details
• Jason Reitman for I Try to Say I Love You, but My Self-Serious Bloviating Gets in the Way
• Quentin Tarantino for I'm a Fucking Badass

And the Oscar should go to...