There are some amazing things going on in Hollywood lately!
Apparently, unauthorized Princess Diana and Madonna biographer Andrew Morton's latest outing (pun intended) focuses on Tom Cruise and how totally and completely batshi* he is. Apparently, there are some rather intriguing assertions in the book, according to London's Daily Mail. My personal favorite is the one about Suri Cruise being a Scientology 'Rosemary's baby!!!' AWESOME.
Personally, while some of the allegations in Morton's book might sound a bit beyond the pale, I don't feel an ounce of skepticism. I mean, we're talking about a religion based on a sci-fi novel, the crux of which is the concept that evil aliens came to populate the earth, died inside a volcano, which then erupted, unleashing their evil spirits upon the planet, which then attached themselves to humans, causing wrongdoing and self-doubt, as well as other "afflicitions" like addiction and homosexuality (hmmm, that last one is awfully interesting given certain rumors about certain Scientologists *cough Tom Cruise John Travolta cough*).
My years in LA afforded me many first-hand accounts of Scientology. I used to work with a kid we'll call Sam who had just moved to LA and was having trouble finding a job. He saw an ad in the paper for a janitor at the Church of Scientology HQ off of Hollywood Blvd. Desperate for work, he applied, and they hired him. So they call him to have him come fill out paperwork, get his uniform and "choose a dorm and roommate."
"I think you've made a mistake. I have an apartment and a roommate, I just need a job," Sam says.
"Uh huh," Scientology lady says, "anyway, we'll need you to come down and pick out a dorm and a roommate."
"Maybe you didn't hear me," Sam says. "I already have a place to live. I have a lease with my name on it, and a roommate. I just need a job."
"Well sir," Scientology lady says, "we're confident that once you see our facilities and meet other members of our team, you'll really want to be a part of the community we have here."
"Ma'am," Sam says, "you're missing the point: I already have a lease I am legally bound to."
"Well, the position you've been hired for is contingent upon you being a residential team member."
"Then I don't want the job!" Sam said.
Ominous silence.
"Are you sure about that, sir?"
"Uh, yeah," Sam says.
Ominous silence.
"Really?"
"Yes! I have an apartment!"
"I would strongly suggest, for your own best interests, that you reconsider."
Sam hung up on the woman, but he was so barraged by phone calls from the Church of Scientology--some friendly and coaxing, some downright menacing--that he had to change his phone number and get a P.O. Box. Yikes.
Also, if you're an LA actor, there are always lots of really helpful seminars to help you in your career listed in the trade mags. Seminars with topics like "How to Overcome Self-Doubt" and "How To Land a Commercial Agent" and "How to Nail that Pilot Audition." All of them feature a celebrity guest--in my day it was always Jenna Elfman (*vomits* sorry, pardon me)--cost an affordable $15, and include...
*cue horror movie soundtrack*
A COPY OF L. RON HUBBARD'S 'DIANETICS.'
Yowza. Seriously that stuff is NUTS. Read about it here ...if you dare...
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