Should Win/Will Win: Best Actress Edition

And the nominees are:

• Sandra Bullock in A Dior Sunglasses Ad from the September 1992 Issue of Town & Country
• Dame Helen of Mirren in Helen Get Your Gun
• Carey Mulligan in SERIOUSLY STOP READING THIS AND GO SEE THIS MOVIE RIGHT NOW
• Gabourey Sidibe in I Secretly Fantasize She Comes Over Each Week to Watch Glee and Eat Pizza Rolls
• Chicken Wings McGee in Yet Another Mediocre Movie that Would Have Been Insufferable Without Meryl Streep

And the Oscar SHOULD go to...

SHOULD WIN:

I'm having a spectacular amount of trouble with this category. Every time I feel like I've arrived at a conclusion, I get into an screaming match with myself that ends in me knocking over the refrigerator and storming out in a rage. 

As previously discussed, I didn't see The Last Station, and as previously discussed, fuck off because neither did you. But Dame Lady Helen the Duchess of Mirren is, in my book, pretty much second only to Our Lady of Intergalactic Resplendence when it comes to perfection. I mean, first of all, The Queen, and second of all this:

Ladies, you will absolutely not look like this at 63, just as, men, you and I will absolutely not look like this at 56. Or ever. 

I don't know what my point is, but...whatever. Helen Mirren!

Carey Mulligan gives a performance in An Education that is...I don't even know what it is. Fiercely intelligent, sharply comedic, expertly measured, wonderfully heartfelt. I'm trying to think of a more eloquent way to say this but it's just simply one of the smartest and most generous performances I've seen in a long, long time. Also GO SEE THIS MOVIE AT ONCE because Carey Mulligan!

I love Meryl and won't speak a word against her. She quite literally became Julia Child. But...I mean...God, I don't know if I can say this without choking on it...sometimes...

Oh my God.

Okay. Sometimes?...Well, I fucking hate this person because ever since I read his article I kind of agree and while I still adore Meryl like she was my own mother sometimes I felt like her performance in Julia and Julia was a bit much and I seriously can't deal with this and I don't even know who I am anymore and I wish I was dead *crumples to floor, covers head, braces for impending caning*

*Ahem*

But still. Meryl Streep! 

I've always felt Sandra Bullock is a vastly underrated actress, but that's also mainly because she makes terrible, terrible movies. I SWEAR TO CHRIST IF YOU SAY ONE WORD ABOUT MISS CONGENIALITY I WILL FUCKING SPIT IN YOUR FACE. The woman makes terrible, terrible movies. But she is very, very good in them--case in point, Crash, a piece of sanctimonious garbage in which Sandy did some absolutely terrific dramatic work. (Also, do yourself a favor and rent a little indie called Lisa Picard Is Famous and watch Bullock's cameo as herself. It is seriously one of the funniest things you'll ever watch.) Even better case in point: the Lifetime Original Movie The Blind Side, which is just this side of terrible and in which the Bullock is absolutely dynamite. In lesser hands, her performance would have been a southern-fried caricature and would have given the movie itself a run for its money in the "What's the Worst Thing About This Movie" sweepstakes. 

But--forgive me for this--are we maybe just a bit overly enthralled simply because we're so used to seeing Sandrina do fluffy little rom-coms and here she is being a Serious Actress? Sandy Lou Who, I think, begs the age old question: should the Oscars be solely about performances alone, or should politics and history be allowed to figure in? I guess it depends on how altruistic you are and what your thoughts are about it being somebody's "year" or "time". Personally, I'm conflicted. On one hand I think it's bullshit. On the other, the whole Oscars THING is a whirlwind of electioneering chicanery outdone only by presidential races, so...why bother even parsing this argument? I mean, let's be realistic: what is the probability that any of these women--Streep included--were better than Countess Helen á Mirren? Slim to none. But don't you sort of feel like, you know, Mirren already won a couple years ago, and nobody saw her movie? It's like Julia Roberts v. Ellen Burstyn all over again and my head hurts.

Anyway. Sandra Bullock!

Finally, Gabourey Sidibe. Where to begin. I don't even...I mean...I can't even find words for...

Oh, fuck it.

SHOULD WIN:

 I mean, seriously. We're done here.

WILL WIN:

Get your head out of your ass. You have a better chance of waking up on your 63rd birthday with hot 56-yr-old Denny Quaid motorboating your magnificent Helen Mirren rack than any of these ladies have of besting the Bullock. 

Comments

[Jeroen]

Okay, I agree and dissagree. I always wanna see every movies that has major nominations, but of course I did not see the Dame Helen Mirren flick, but who did. But seriously, Mirren, Dench, Blancett, and Streep are so perfect in everything they do (except Streep in Mamma Mia...still have a hard time forgiving her for that), they could win an Oscar for all of it.
I find it difficult this year, but this is it for me:
SHOUL WIN:
Carey Mulligan
WILL WIN:
Sandra Bullock

I just saw The Blind Side last week and was utterly dissapointed (but I also did not think much of Precious...maybe I just don't feel anything and am dead inside), and was not impressed with Sandy's performance. I do agree 100% with you that Sandy is an amazing actress, and I would love to see her win, because, well, I just love her! But this part...hmm, not so much Oscar worthy. And Gabourey Sidibe...nah, I was not impressed!

[John the Craptist]

I wouldn't be upset if Mulligan won at all. She was just frankly fucking genius in that movie. Really looking forward to her making more films soon!